Never Ending Love and Misery
by hawaiianbabe927
Summary: Clare and Eli are dating and things start to get really physical but what happens when Clare gets drugged by a stranger at Adam's party?
1. Ch 1 Restless

**Never Ending Love and Misery**

Ch. 1 Restless

I lay in bed restless tossing and turning. I try relaxing my mind and body, but in no way shape or form can I fall asleep. Stupid Eli, always on my mind. Why can't I just focus on something else, anything else other then that annoying heartbreak smirk on his face. I wish I could stop wanting to feel his body against mine. I mean I can't want that, I'm Saint Clare according to just about everyone at school. It's not my fault, I was raised to do right be God. Not to mention the purity ring that's on my finger at this very moment.

I hear a quiet ding, soon followed by bright light coming from laptop. I jump out of bed too quickly and give myself a nasty head rush. Stumbling over to my laptop I see a new IM from Eli has popped up on my screen.

Eli-gold49: Hey Edwards

Clare-e23: Hey

Eli-gold49: What are you doing up so late?

Clare-e23: What? You're the one who messaged me.

I gave a slight laugh and rolled my eyes in amusement.

Eli-gold49: I know I just wanted to see if you were up

Clare-e23: why?

Eli-gold9: because I wanna do something

Clare-e23: what?

_Eli-gold49 is offline._

Wow just like Eli, telling me he's going to do something but not what he's planning on doing. And the thing is I don't really mind. I decide I should turn off my laptop so I don't get any new messages popping up. I stay at my computer desk staring at the blank screen. I know I should go back to bed but my mind is racing with the endless possibilities of what he wanted to do.

I jumped as I heard a loud tapping on my window. Though I my brain told me to just ignore it and go back to bed, I walked over and saw a silhouette. I backed away and reached for my light.

"Clare, it's just me Eli." I hear the silhouette say. I see him standing on the tree outside my window. "Clare are you gonna let me in or are you gonna make me stay out here all night." he whispered as I opened the window.

As Eli climbing through my window, I was climbing into bed. _Boy oh boy did I pick the wrong night to wear a pair of short shorts and spaghetti strapped tank top without my bra on._ I think as Eli gives me a cocky smirk.I swear to god above I'm going to wind up killing this boy one day.

"What are you doing here?" I ask barely above a whisper, pulling my soft red blanket over me.

"Well I couldn't sleep and I figured because you think of me twenty-four hours of the day, you'd wouldn't be able to sleep either." he replied smugly.

Although he was right, there was no was no way I was going to admit it. So I just settled with rolling my eyes and being thankful that he couldn't see me blush. "You know if my parents come in here they'll freak." I say trying to fill the silence.

"But Edwards, wasn't it you who told me to live dangerously? I mean we've only got one life to live so we should make the best of it and all that jazz right? Unless you're too scared to keep up with me."

_Damn it! This boy knows I won't back down from a challenge!_ "Fine." I mumble biting my lower lip.

Eli walks over and plops down next to me on the bed. We start talking about little things, and the more we talk the closer we get. And I mean physically closer. By the time we acknowledge the fact that Eli should probably leave, I'm snuggled against him. My head is resting lightly on his chest, and I'm listening to rhythm of his heart as it lulls me to sleep.


	2. Ch 2 Sneaky Little Me

**Never Ending Love And Misery**

Ch. 2 Sneaky Little Me

Eli's P.O.V.

Clare is so cute when she thinks I can't see her blushing in the dark, but doesn't she realize the faint light from the alarm clock gives her away?. "You know if my parents come in here they'll freak." she whispers. I wonder if she knows her voice is shaking. Wow, glad to know what kind of effect I have on her.

"But Edwards, wasn't it you who told me to live dangerously? I mean we've only got one life to live so we should make the best of it and all that jazz right? Unless you're too scared to keep up with me." I say using the words _she_ used on our first date.

I could see the slight frustration in her face as she quickly debated this. "Fine." she grumbles at me, gently biting her lower lip. I wish mine was the lower lip she was gently biting. Her delicate arms wrapped around my neck, me gently caressing her face with my hand while pressing our lips together.

_No! Stop! This is not why you came here! You came here to be with her, not _**be with her**. I think, shaking the thoughts out of my mind and flopping into the bed next to her. We aren't really talking about anything important, just the small things going on in our lives.

As we're talking I notice we're gradually moving towards each other, and I wonder if she notices too. If she does, she doesn't say anything. And before too long when she even mentions the point of me leaving she's laying with her head on my chest, and breathing deeper and deeper until she falls asleep.

I can't help but be entranced while watching her sleep. As I gently push her hair out of her face so I can see her clearly, she lightly drapes her right arm across my stomach.

Knowing I'll have to get up early so I can make it out of her house without a parental showdown, I take my phone out of my pocket and set the alarm for four-thirty am and set it on vibrate. I wrap my arm around Clare's shoulders and let myself sleep.

I wake too soon to the annoying buzzing in my pocket. Turning off myself phone, I rub my eyes and try to think of a way to get out of bed. As gently as I can, I unwind myself from her arms and put a pillow in my place. While I'm about to put her blanket on her again, I notice her pink tank top and short shorts. I try not smiling, but fail miserably. What can I say, I'm a guy. I kiss her gently on the forehead, and steal one last look at her before making my way out of her window.

Once home I can't seem to fall asleep. Even though I got _maybe_ an hour of sleep at Clare's house, I'm wide awake and that doesn't seem likely to change any time soon. Thoughts of Clare keep swirling around in my mind without my permission. With as much time as I spend thinking about this girl, I feel like I should be in one of those romance movies I can't stand watching. What has this girl turned me into? And the even scarier question, why don't I care?

After a painful amount of time spent staring at my ceiling, it's finally an acceptable time to start getting ready for school. After I'm ready to go I spend an ungodly amount of waiting in my kitchen so I don't get to school any earlier then usual. I don't want to seem like this girl has any effect on me. _But she does. She has an enormous_ _effect on you._ an inner voice tells me as I head out my door.

On my way to school I turn my music as loud as it can go, trying to drowned out the thoughts in my head. "Damn that girl for invading my mind without even knowing what she's doing." I mumble as I pull into a parking space. _You don't really want the thoughts of her to go away do you? Because she just might come around to her senses and leave you all because you jinxed your relationship._ that same inner voice threatened while I made my way into the school.

"Great, now I'm starting to get in disagreements with myself. Could I get any more psychotic?"

"Probably not, but why are you having arguments with yourself?" I hear a voice behind me say.

I turn around and see Clare's smiling face. "I said _disagreement_ not _argument_. But either way you put it there's no special reason behind it. Just going crazy thinking about how much you must miss me when I'm not with you." I say smugly, trying to hide how pathetic I feel.

"Yep you figured me out, whenever you're not with me I'm a heartbroken mess." she giggled, putting her hand on her heart. I draped my arm around her shoulders, needing to have her close to me.

"So how was your night?" I asked wondering what her reaction would be.

"Fine, I went to bed early and pretty much slept through the night."

_She's kidding right?_ the inner voice asked. "Oh really?"

"Really." The way she said it, she sounded slightly smug. Kind of like me. _Great now you're corrupting your girlfriend._

"You know Clare, I never really pegged you as the type of girl who wore tank tops and short shorts to bed." This got her attention. Her expression was one of the funniest things I've ever seen.

Those beautiful blue eyes of hers just about popped out of her head as her jaw hit the floor. "You were really in my room last night?" she whispered through her teeth. "I thought that was just a dream."

"Why do you dream about me being in your room often?" I ask, kind of liking the thought.

Clare let out a breath and rolled her eyes. "You wish." Sadly yes, I do wish she did. "What time did you leave?" she asked changing the subject.

"Around four."

"I didn't hear you climb out the window, or get out of bed for that fact. How were you able not to wake me? I'm a really light sleeper."

"Sneaky little me." I said wrapping my arms around her waist. "Gotta use you're imagination." I kissed her neck just below the ear and felt her lean into me ever so slightly.


	3. Ch 3 A Party Sounds Fun

**Never Ending Love and Misery**

Ch. 3 A Party Sounds Fun

**Clare's P.O.V.**

"_Use your imagination", God that boy is _so _cocky! He get's way too much pleasure out of making me squirm!_ I think as I'm walking into English.

"Hey Clare." Adam says as he sees me sitting down.

"What the hell is that suppose to mean anyway? 'use your imagination'. God sometimes I just wan to hit him." Adam gives me a questioning look. "Never mind." I say shaking my head lightly.

"So me and Drew are throwing a party tonight, you wanna come?" he asks while putting something in his notebook.

"Is there going to drugs or alcohol?" I will not go anywhere near drugs or alcohol, I'm tap dancing along the line with what I do with Eli.

"No and no." he laughed.

"Then sure, sounds like fun." I couldn't help but smile when I saw Eli walk in the room, I looked down and bit my bottom lip hoping to hide my embarrassment.

"What sounds like fun?" he asked, taking his seat in front of me.

"A party me and Drew are throwing tonight. You in?"

"Hell yeah. It wouldn't be a party without me. And beside we all know Saint Clare doesn't know how to have fun at a party, so I have to make sure she doesn't feel awkward."

_Oh, what a little ass._ "Well you know there is one way for you to be absolutely sure I won't feel awkward at the party." I say leaning in so close to him I can feel his breath quicken very slightly.

"And what would that be?" he asks leaning forward.

I sat back in my seat quickly, crossed my arms over my chest and put on one of Eli's smug smiles. "Don't come." I couldn't believe I actually pulled that one off with a straight face, lord knows I wouldn't go unless Eli's going.

"Ouch! Now that's a bit harsh don't you think?" he laughed.


	4. Ch 4 What Did I Just Do

**Never Ending Love and Misery**

**Ch 4. What Did I Just Do**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

I'm on my way to pick up Clare for the party. I don't know why I feel so anxious, it's not like I haven't seen her out of school before. Hell, I snuck over to her house and spent the night with her last night. _It's because you're falling deeper and deeper in love with this girl stupid._ The annoying voice in my head replied to the unsaid thought.

That little voice is really beginning to get on my nerves. I think as I almost miss Clare's turn. After I park my car, I turn it off and head up the steps to her door. Before I have a chance to knock, Clare already has the door open. "I heard the music in you're car playing a mile ago." she smirked, answering the question my expression asked.

"Well then are you ready to go?" I ask gesturing to my hearse. She nods slightly and makes her way to my car. I can't help but notice that she's wearing a black skirt that barely makes way a fourth down her thigh and two form-fitting tank tops, bottom one black and the top one slightly lacy and white. Of course under the skirt were white leggings and she had on a black cardigan, but still not here usually attire.

The blaring music startles her as I start up the, I give a light laugh and turn it down. "Love the short skirt by the way." I state as we're driving down the road.

I look over and see her head down trying to hide the fact that she's blushing. "It's just a shame you had what it _didn't_ cover, covered up by leggings." I joked, returning my eyes to the road.

Clare smacked me playfully on the arm and laughed. "Can I change the song? This one is really starting to irritate me."

_Don't even act like you have to think about it, you know you're not going to deny her. Especially if something is making her uncomfortable even in the slightest._ The voice stated, apparently it wasn't going to allow Clare to suffer. "Sure, go ahead." I answered, shrugging my shoulders.

Clare reaching for the knob on my radio and switched the station. Some pop song I wanted nothing to do with was playing. "That's for making fun of my leggings." she laughed then stuck her tongue out at me.

Sometimes this girl makes me go so damn crazy I feel like I should be in a psyche ward. _And you already have the voice in you're head, so you're part way there._ the voce mocked.

Finally we arrive at Adam's house. Clare has her head down and an expression that says she's thinking about something, but isn't telling me. "What going on in that brain of your's Edwards?"

She looks up quickly and smiles. "Oh nothing. I was just zoning out." she laughs. I drape my arm over her shoulders as we walk up the steps to Adam's house, and she intertwines her finger's with mine.

When Adam opens the door he has that stupid grin on his face. Clare let go of my hand and unwound from my hold, only to embrace my friend in a hug. She smugly looked back at me in a way that I couldn't help but find adorable. "Trying to make a move on my girl Adam?" I joke while wrapping my arms around Clare's waist.

"Hey not my fault man. The girl came to me." Adam laughed gesturing us to come in.

"Yeah it's not his fault _you_ can't get the job done. " Clare said, making my jaw drop.

"Edwards! That's pretty naughty for you." I say looking at her in disbelief. Her only response was a simple shrug of her delicate shoulders.

"Oh Clare, I have a surprise for you in the kitchen by the sink." Adam says giving her a slight push in the direction of her destination. Clare walked off into the kitchen as Adam walked off to Fiona.

I hear an excited squeal coming from Clare in the kitchen. "Should I be worried? I ask walking in there to see what she was so jazzed up about. I see her practically jumping up and with her friend Alli in her arms with a tight hug.

"I haven't seen you in such a long time! What are you doing here?" Clare announced after finally letting her go.

"Well Adam called me up and asked if I wanted to come. At first I told him no, but the he told me Drew was completely over me and that you were coming so then I had to. I couldn't miss the chance to see my best friend. I tell you girls at my new school are stuck up little snobs." Ali seemed just as excited as Clare.

Clare and Ali talked for what seemed like ages of useless gossip, but I wasn't going to ruin the reunion between my girlfriend and her friend. I wanted to walk off and go find Adam, but for some reason I had this strong feeling telling me that I shouldn't leave Clare's side. Like something bad was going to happen if I left her. _That's because you're becoming a tad bit over protective of her._ The always infuriating voice told me.

Only because this is a party. And not that I don't trust Adam when he said they wouldn't be providing drugs or alcohol, I just don't trust most of the people at this party. Hell I don't even know most of the people at the party. And in all honesty I don't Adam does either. I argue back. _You're getting crazier._ the voice nags.

"Eli?" Clare says, interrupting my thoughts. When I meet her eyes, she an adorable smile on her face. "Where'd you go?" she asked, apparently noticing my spacing out.

"Nowhere, just thinking." I reply, wrapping both my arms around her waist from behind and lightly kiss the side of her neck.

"Okay, I'm just gonna go find someone else to gossip with before the two of you begin to tear each other's clothes off." Ali says before heading off to find Jenna.

"I can't believe Ali's here, I miss her so much sometimes." Clare says, turning around and placing her arms around my neck. I lean down and give her a gentle kiss on her lips, my hands now placed on the sides of her hips.

When we pull back she's has the same expression on her face that she had when we got out of the car. "Clare are you okay?" I ask slightly concerned about her quietness.

"I'm fine why?"

"Because you look like you're upset about something. Is it about the party? 'Cause if you want we can leave. I wouldn't have a problem with it."

Clare lightly shook her head. "No I'm fine don't worry, I've just been kind of out of it today. Sort of like you when I was talking about Ali." she smiled, assuring me she was okay.

I wasn't sure why we were having as much fun as we were, I mean it's not like we were doing anything besides talking. But I was having fun none the less. Somehow, Clare and I wound up upstairs and in the bathroom. My guess is that we were trying to get away from the noise so we could actually hear each other. "What is your favorite color Mr. Goldsworthy?" she asks during our game of twenty questions.

"Blue." I say without needing to think about it.

"Not black?" she asks in disbelief.

"Nope. Blue."

"And why is blue your favorite color?"

"Because it's the color of your gorgeous eyes" It's only after I say it, that I realize how cheesy that sounds.

It seems as if she doesn't think it's a cheesy as I do considering the fact that she leans forward kissing me as my reward.

It first begins as a few playful pecks on the lips, but steadily evolves into much deeper, much more passionate kisses.

As I'm fighting the desperate need to feel her entire body against mine, she slides her hands under my shirt and gently slips her tongue in my mouth. Making an involuntary and unwanted moan of pleasure escape my lips. _Well that sure as hell didn't make this any easier._ the little voice said as she pulled her hands back out of my shirt.

While I'm pulling her body closer to mine, I realize how little self-control I have when it comes to the beautiful girl molded against me. She moves her hands up the front of shirt, and unbuttons the top one.

That's what makes all my morality snap back in place. "Clare what are you doing?" I gasp, forcing myself away from her.

I can see the confusion spreading across her face. "I was just… well I thought that… I- I- I don't know, I was just you know."

"Clare how many times do we have to go through this before it finally get through? I'm not having sex with you." I almost shout.

Soon the confused expression turns into a much worse one, hurt. The look on her face absolutely breaks my heart to know I was the one who put it there. After a second she straightens up too much for what's normal for her. "Okay, sorry I misunderstood you. It won't happen again." she says coldly and storms out of the bathroom.

_Oh my God, what did you just do?_ the voice says in disbelief. And for once I agree with it.


	5. Ch 5 Funny Feeling

**Never Ending Love And Misery**

**Ch. Funny Feeling**

**Clare's P.O.V.**

I can feel my throat close up as the words repeat in my head. "Okay, sorry I misunderstood you. It won't happen again." I say, straightening up trying to compose myself. I'm almost certain the hurt I feel inside is showing in my expression.

I storm out of the bathroom, leaving him there with some dumb expression on his face. I couldn't believe how stupid I was, throwing myself at him. As if rejection the first time wasn't enough. I make my way to the kitchen hoping Ali's in there so I can talk to her. I find her grabbing some punch and talking to Adam.

As soon as she sees my face, she excuses herself from Adam and runs over to me. "Oh my god Clare what happened?" she asked, concern filling her voice. After explaining what just happened between me and Eli, Ali looked royally pissed off. "I will kill him!" Ali says while handing me a cup of punch, then turning to go up stairs.

I set down my cup so I can have both my hands free to stop her. "No Ali don't. It's fine. I don't want to think about it right okay? I just want to have a good time at this party." Ali rolls her and but eventually gives in and agrees to leave it be.

I feel someone bump into me and almost knock me into Ali. "Hey!" I shout turning around.

"Sorry, my bad." a guy I've never met before apologized.

"It's okay. I'm just not having the best of nights." I say tucking my straightened hair behind my ear. The guy gives me a questioning look. "Long story." I say shaking my head.

"Well can I get you a drink to make it up to you?" he asks.

"Oh, um I already have a drink. I say pointing to my cup on the counter.

Ali sighs as the stranger hands me my cup but walks away as if someone called her name. And speaking of names, "I'm Clare." I say reaching my hand out for him to shake.

"Nathan." he replies, taking my hand.

While we're talking I'm drinking my punch, but to my sadness my cup eventually runs out in the middle in our talk about… something. I can't really remember what we were talking about only that I wanted more punch. "Can you get me some more to drink, my cup is empty now." I say slowly, having to really concentrate on my words so they come out right.

Nathan nods and goes off to do… whatever it was I asked him do. "Here you go beautiful." he says, holding a cup out for me to take. It took a lot of effort, but I grabbed the cup from him and took a big drink from it. I heard a song playing from… somewhere and followed it. I wound up in the living room, with Nathan saying something to me that I didn't quite here.

It was so hard to focus on anything else besides the sound of the beat that had my body moving. Nathan started dancing with me while I took a few more drinks of my punch. After a few songs passed by, it started to get really hot. So I unthinkingly took off my black cardigan and my white leggings. While I slid the legging off, I noticed I wasn't wearing my shoes.

_How did my shoes come?_ I thought looking at my feet. _I don't remember taking them off. Then again I don't necessarily remember putting them on. God I have such a funny feeling throughout my body right now._ I wiggled my toes, laughing at how cool it made my foot feel,

It wasn't until I felt someone kiss my neck that I remembered I was supposed to be dancing with someone… I think. I turned around and kissed whoever it was on the lips. It seemed like the right thing to do.

"Clare?" I heard someone shout. I turned toward the voice and saw Adam's shocked face. Or at least I _think_ it was Adam, colors and faces seemed to be blending in a lot.

"I don't remember." I laughed, somehow remembering his earlier question.

"What do you mean you don't know? You had your tongue down this guys throat when you're supposed to be dating Eli." Adam shouted over the music.

"This isn't Eli?" I asked, looking at who I had been kissing. His face was not Eli's. However if you squint you're eyes just right and tilt your head, he could pass for Eli.

"No! Of course it's not Eli! Clare what the hell is wrong with you?" Adam stated in a harsh voice. I don't even remember what we're talking about anymore, let alone what's wrong with me. "Clare, are you on drugs right now?" Adam asked in a serious voice.

"No, no. I never do anything like that. Remember I'm Saint Clare!" I laughed leaning against the wall in front of me. It felt kind of weird when the wall wrapped an arm around my waist. I looked up to say hello to the magical wall and saw that Nathan guy I just met. "Hey buddy." I tell him before leaning my head on him. I feel like my head is going to fall off my body it's so heavy right now.

"Okay Clare I think it's time for you to go home." Someone behind me says as they grab one of my arms and sets me on a soft cloud. "Stay right here." the voice tells me. I look up and see that it's Adam talking to me again. He walks off someplace and I notice that the soft cloud I was sitting on just happened to be a very comfortable couch.

"You wanna go someplace more private?" I hear Nathan ask as he walks up to me.

"I would say yes, but I can't get up." I say wearily.

"Why? Just because that little douche told you not to?"

"No, because I can't get up." I answered honestly.

Nathan laughed then picked me up and carried me down the stairs to what I believe is the basement, either that or a dungeon for prisoners. "There problem solved." Nathan laughed while setting me on the cold dungeon floor.

He started kissing my neck and rubbing my body. I wasn't sure why but I didn't like this. Soon he was on top of me kissing me sloppily. "No, get off me." I mumbled when he took his head away for air. I wanted to sound more fierce but all I could get out was the mumble.

"Oh come on you know you want to." he said while grabbing my breast. I shook my head but he kept going. I tried to think about something else when he started to take off one of my tank tops. I knew I should keep fighting but my body wouldn't budge.

"CLARE!" I hear someone shout from the stairs of the dungeon. Nathan and I both looked over to see who my knight in shining armor was.

"Eli!" I said with as much gratefulness as my body would allow. Which didn't come out that well.


	6. Ch 6 Just in Time

**Never Ending Love and Misery**

**Ch. 6 Just in Time**

**Eli's P.O.V.**

"I highly doubt Clare would make out with some random stranger she just met at a party. And it's even less likely that she got drunk and took off her leggings and jacket." I say rolling my eyes at Adam's absurd accusation.

"Dude! Her jacket _and_ her leggings are right here!" he shouted, holding articles of my girlfriend's clothing.

"Okay time to go." I say heading for there stairs. "Where did you last see her?" I asked practically leaping down the stairs.

"I left her on the couch and told her to stay there. And judging by how she looked and was acting, I don't think she could have made it anywhere further then the floor next to the coffee table." he said following close behind me.

When I made it to the living room, Clare wasn't anywhere near the couch or the coffee table. Adam and I shared a quick glance, then immediately ran in different directions to find her.

"Clare!" I shout going through the kitchen. _And_ the bathroom, _and_ the hallways, and even a couple closets. I could not for the life of me, find my girlfriend. _Way to go asshole now you can't find her._ This voice in my head was extremely accurate, but in no way helping me find her. _Check the basement before you start to freak out. _Finally this annoying little voice has a helpful idea.

I couldn't believe the horrific show I got when I walked into the basement. "Clare!" I shout in disbelief. Clare was on the ground with some guy on top of her taking off the first tank top.

"Eli." she mumbles, looking completely out of it. Something wasn't right with this picture. And it's not just the fact that a stranger is groping her, she looks like she's exhausted and doesn't want him touching her. "Eli can you help me lift this heavy weight off me. It's terrible uncomfortable and it's making me too hot." she says, slurring every word.

_Heavy weight?_ the voice inside me asked. But in that same instance, my brain clicked and I figured out what was really going on. Before my brain was aware of what was happening, my body was in action. I couldn't understand anything but the blind rage bursting out of my body.

"ELI!" I hear someone shout breaking through whatever wall I had put up that blocked out absolutely everyone and everything. I looked over towards the sound and see Clare's terrified, bewildered face. "Eli stop." she says, looking below me,

I follow her gaze and see the boy who was just on top of her. His face covered in blood, bruising and swelling like a bad action movie. I hadn't even realized I hit the guy let alone started beating the shit out of him. Letting him go I walked slowly over to Clare grabbing her tank top and picking her up. The way I carried her out of the basement, I felt like a hero at the end of a story sweeping off the damsel in distress.

"Eli did you know you're really strong?" Clare asks _sort of_ wrapping her arms around my neck to hold on. I say _sort of_ because she tried to, but her tired body would only allow her put her hands on my shoulders and lay her head on my chest. She had a smile on her face that didn't belong there, especially under the circumstances. "You're just like my knight in shiny armor." she laughed lazily.

"Don't you mean knight in _shining_ armor, not _shiny_ armor" I said, trying to stay calm so I don't scare her again. But every fiber in my body was screaming to go back and kill the guy who almost… God I can't even think it!

I see Ali and Adam talking, which is really convenient when you think about it. "Oh my God you found her." Ali said running up to me and placing her hand on Clare's shoulder.

"Hey it's my bestest friend in the whole wide world Ali." Clare murmured happily as she saw her friend in front of her. After a second glance Clare squinted her eyes. "Or at least I think that's Ali. Ali that's you isn't it?" she asks reaching out and lightly touching Ali's face.

"Of course it's me. Clare what's wrong with you?" Ali looked straight up at me. "What's wrong with her? Why is she acting like this?" Ali saw Clare's tank top draped over my shoulder and her eyes about bugged out her head. "You little-" she started.

"No! Of course not!" I interrupted, disgusted at the very thought. "Look it's complicated and I'll have Adam tell you later but right now I need you to tell her parents that she'll be staying at your house for tonight. Now she won't really be staying at your house. But her parents won't agree to letting her stay the night with me."

"Eli she might as well just stay with me. I mean-" she was about to begin her speech of why Clare should stay with her, but stopped when I gave her a pleading look. I couldn't let Clare out of my sight. _You have to protect her!_ the voice in my mind shouted.

Ali nodded, giving me a understanding look, then proceeded to call Clare's parents. After she got off the phone Ali rubbed her forehead and looked at Clare, then to me. "Take good care of her okay?"

"Okay." was all I could say. I started to head for the door when I remembered an earlier thought. "Oh by the way Adam, the guy who drugged Clare is in the basement with a busted up face." I said turning slightly towards him.

"Where are we going?" Clare asked as I set her down in my car.

"We're going to my house." I answer buckling her in. She lets her head fall back against the, but attempts to bring it back up when I closed my door after I got in.

"Eli?" she asks as I start my car and slam it in drive.

"What Clare?"

'Are you mad at me?"

I give her a sideways glance then remember she's completely stoned out of her mind. "No, of course not. Why would I be mad at you?"

"Because I think I kissed someone. I can't tell you for sure but I think that I did and." she paused for a second to take in a breath. "And the back of your car is kind of scary and it's kinda sorta maybeish giving me the chills."

The rest of the car ride was filled with silence from my end, Clare however was talking about any little thought that came to her mind. A very small, minute part of me, the part that finds every movement of hers endearing, found her incoherent rambling a little bit cute. Unfortunately I could still feel the rage filled heat rippling through my body, and the anger overpowered the soft side.

Oh God this is going to be fun explaining. I think as I carry Clare up the steps to my house. I kick the door, unable to open it myself, and wait for someone to answer. My Dad opens the door and confusion crosses his face, that is until he looks at my half unconscious girlfriend. Then his face turns into concern.

"Is she okay? What happened to her?" he asked as I carried her into the house.

I gave an internal groan, but sighed because I knew I had to explain some things to him. "Okay long story short, Clare and I had a misunderstanding. She got upset, went downstairs, then some guy slipped drugs into her drink." I said as quickly as I could, I just wanted to get her upstairs. Right now, everyone was an enemy in my eyes. I didn't care who it was, everyone at this point is someone I have to protect Clare from.

"Did you call the police?" my dad asked, looking like he's still processing what I just said.

"No. And before you say it, I can't bring her to the hospital. If she goes to the hospital her parents are going to have to come and they'll think that she does drugs all the time."

Eventually my Dad just shook his head and went into the living room to watch T.V.

I carried her up the stairs and into my room, all the while trying to think of what to do for her. It was incredibly hard to keep my temper under control, each time I looked at her she would give me the same stoned smile. As I walked into my room I couldn't have been more happy Clare has been helping me clean out my room. If I still had all that stuff in it, I would have had such a hard time trying to maneuver around with her in my arms.

"Your bed is so comfortable." she chuckled as I set her down. Clare tried grabbing the blanket to cover herself, but gave up quickly. "Eli, your blanket is broken." she complained.

"That's because your laying on Clare bear." I say using the nickname she seems to very much dislike.

I picked her up again, pulled the blanket back, then set her down and covered her. "Eli it's still really cold, could you come hold me?" she asked opening her eyes just a little.

"Clare I don't know if that's a-"

"Eli please." she said actually sitting up. Anyone could see that she was still _very_ stoned, but she seemed very determined to have me hold her. _Go lay down with her._ the voice demanded. _It's your fault she's like this in the first place, if you hadn't rejected her the way you did she would have stayed with you and she wouldn't have met whoever the hell that disgusting bastard was._

I saw her smile as I crawled under the blanket and wrapped my arms around her. "You got to me just in time, I almost froze to death." she laughed, wrapping her arm around my waist and laying her head on my chest. Her breathing got deeper and deeper until she finally fell asleep.

"Yeah." I whispered. "I got to you just in time."


	7. Ch 7 Composed

**Sorry I lost wi-fi at my house and i wasn't able to post my story. This one is going to be longer then the others and i hope you like it.**

**Never Ending Love and Misery**

**Ch, Composed**

**Clare's POV**

_God why is it so bright in here?_ I think as I wake to all of Hell's furry shining in my face. I rub my eyes and feel something moving underneath me. When I lift my head I see Eli's face staring down at me. "Hey you." I say, my voice hoarse.

"Hey." he said, giving a half smile. "How do you feel right now Clare?"

"What why?" I laughed lightly.

"Clare please, just answer the question." I didn't see my boyfriend's annoyingly heatbreaking smirk plastered on his face.

I rolled my eyes but answered anyways. "I feel exhausted. Like I've been sleeping for days, but I was tossing and turning the entire time. Now will you please tell me why my boyfriend is all Mr. Serious?"

Eli took in a breath and let it out slowly, the look on his face said he wasn't sure how to proceed. "Clare how much of last night do you remember?" I started to ask him why again, but he gave me a look I didn't understand so I felt obligated to tell him.

"You picked me up to go to Adam's party, Ali was there and I talked to her for a little while. Then you and I started wandering around the house playing 20 questions. After a while we started kissing and when I tried to go a little further you yelled at me." he winced at that last part but I just continued. "I went into the kitchen to find Ali and." I couldn't remember what happened after that. I felt my expression change the more I tried to remember but I couldn't.

"Clare do you remember anything after that?" he asked as I rubbed my face trying really hard to remember. I shook my head in defeat. As he was telling me what happened I couldn't believe it.

"No. This kind of stuff doesn't happen to me. It just doesn't. I'm Saint Clare, drugs and alcohol and rape don't happen to me." I felt like I was about to implode, but then I looked at Eli. His hands were clinched into tight fists, his knuckles turning white and from just his face you could tell he was in a dark place. I took a deep breath and calmed myself. "He didn't actually rape me right?" I asked, cringing internally at the word rape.

"No, but that bastard still-" I placed my hands on both side of his face until he looked at me.

"Then I'm ok." I interrupted, he everted his eyes away from me. "Eli look at me, I'm fine. See no harm done, Saint Clare is ok." I say uncurling his fists and intertwining our fingers. "I'm not hurt, I'm still a virgin, everything is fine."

He looked up at me, his eyes full of anger and pain. Eventually he gave me a smile and kissed me gently on the forehead. "Would you mind terribly if I went to take a shower?" I asked, feeling gross because I was still in the clother from last night.

"Of corse not. That is if I'm allowed to join you." his smirk told me he was alright again, giving me the ok to leave him for a little bit. It's a good thing I've been helping Eli clean up his room, otherwise I wouldn't be able to hurry up and grab a towel before his parents saw me. Don't get me wrong his parents are great and they let me in there house at any time day or night, I just didn't want them getting the wrong idea.

Just as I walked up to the bathroom door Eli's mom was walking out of it. "Clare." she said in a surprised yet happy tone. "I didn't know you were here."

"Uh, yeah something happened at the party last night and I couldn't really go home." I don't know why I just said that.

"Oh. Well you know you're always welcome here." she laughed. I was very greatful she didn't ask for details about what happened. About half way during my shower images of what happened last night came flowing into my head against my will and the next thing I knew i was sitting on the floor of the shower crying.

**Eli's POV**

As soon as Clare left the room my smirk was wiped clean off my face. I'm not stupid I know Clare only composed herself because she didn't want me freaking out. _Wow you're making her be the one who has to be strong in the relationsihp. You may be angry because of what happened to her, but it actually happened to her. And weather or not she remembers, she still needs to be able to talk about it without you freaking out._ the little voice said. Which I knew the voice was right but I still couldn't help the fact that I still wanted to kill that guy for what he did you Clare.

I heard my mom talking to Clare outside the bathroom. Thank God my parents aren't usually ones for asking questions. After what seemed like an eternity Clare came rushing back into my room in nothing but a towel, locking the door behind her. "Clare you okay?" I ask raising my eye brows.

"Yeah." she says, letting out a breath I wasn't sure she knew she was holding.

"Then why did you burst into my bed room like mission impossible?" I ask standing up, trying not to notice my half naked girlfriend standing in my room.

"Because compared to the bathroom I just left, it's really cold in the rest of your house." she running her hand through her wet hair. I wish I could be the one running my fingers through her hair. Feeling her soft skin against mine- "Would it be alright if I barrowed some of your clothes?" she asked interrupting my thoughts.

"What?" I asked like a complete idiot.

"I asked if I could barrow some of your clothes. I don't really wanna go home in the same clothes I left in." she said smiling.

I took me a second but I was finally able to get back to reality. "Yeah, sure. Of corse." I said shaking my head. I handed her a pair black and grey pajama pants, a black long sleeved shirt, and a black hoodie. _Wow, way to make her look goth. _When I handed them to her I noticed something. "Clare. Why are your eyes red?"

"Because I'm me and got soap in my eyes." she laughed.

I didn't believe her but didn't feel like starting an argument, so I simply began walking towards the door. "Where are you going?" she asked as I reached for the door knob.

"Just into the hallway." _I'm trying to do the right thing and not give into temptation._

"Why?" she asked, raising an eyebrow.

"So you can get dressed." I reminded her, gesturing towards the clothes on the bed.

She just rolled her eyes and slipped the pants on under the towel, turned around so her back was facing me and took removed the towel completely. Although I couldn't see anything but her bare back, I still couldn't help but stare as she slipped my long sleeve shirt on without her bra. I was barely able to compose myself as she pulled the hoodie over her head.

"What?" she giggled after she turned around. It turns out I wasn't as composed as I thought I was. I won't lie though, I did like seeing her in my clothes. It made me feel like she was mine forever.

"Well for starters I think you look absolutely adorable in black." I laughed, walking over to her and wrapping my arms around her waist. "And I also just wanted to say very daring blue eyes. Very daring."

"If that's daring then wait until I do a little something else." she says as she turns around to face me

"What are you planning Edwards?" I ask suspicously.

As I'm going over different options in my head she get's a very seductive look on her face. "Just this." she whispers just before crashing her lips into mine. I took me a second to kiss back because, well in all honesty I wasn't expecting that much intensity that quickly from her. When I pulled back ever so slightly to breath she takes that oppertunity to stick her toung in my mouth. Seeing as I'm usual the one who make the first move when it comes to involvement of our toungs this all but knocked me on my ass with shock.

And as if to send me into cardiac arrest, she started to move me over towards the bed and had me laying down. She slid her hands under my shirt to feel my chest, almost making a moan escape me, but lucky me I stopped it just before it came out. I couldn't help myself from running my hands down the back of her thighs. I felt her smirk and couldn't stop from smirking along with her.

Well that is until I found out _why_ she was smirking. With a giggle Clare backed away, "I'm gonna call Ali so she knows I'm okay." she giggled walking over to my dresser so she could grab my phone. When she finished making her phone call, I was still sitting on the bed with my mouth hanging open like an idiot. "What?" she sitting on the bed next to me. "I told you I'd be daring."

_Okay what is wrong with your girlfriend?_


End file.
